Arrgle Gift Guide – Newsletter 12/05/2023

DECEMBER 5, 2023
You’re stuck. You have seventy or eighty people to buy gifts for and your mind is blank.

We’re here to help.

Spread warmth and happiness with presents chosen from the Arrgle Holiday Gift Guide 2023!


Our suggestions for the best gifts of the year:

(1) Uncommon Scents, a funny novel about augmented reality, corporate conspiracies, and Howard the Duck comic books.

(2) Two copies of Uncommon Scents, in case one is accidentally heaved with great force into the swimming pool.

(3) That’s it. Really, that ought to be enough. Throw in something else if you like – a Xmas tree ornament or chocolate turtles or a trip to Hawaii, say – and you’re done with your shopping.
Everyone likes books. Everyone likes receiving books as gifts. But I know you – you’re paralyzed because there are too many choices. You’re afraid you’ll get something your loved one has already read, which would be a tragic mistake, never forgotten.

Uncommon Scents is the only safe choice. We’ve looked at our sales figures, so we know with confidence that the people in your life have not read it yet. When they open their copy, their eyes will light up and they will turn to you and say words, possibly happy words. Stay engaged with them while they process their feelings and maybe don’t turn your back on them for a few days.
Today’s reading is from Uncommon Scents, a novel of subtle charm with romance, comedy, and just a hint of mint.

In this passage, two Arrgle software engineers are having a friendly chat about their shared interest in stamp collecting, or fjords, or something like that, I can’t remember.

————————————————————————–

Barry turned back with a glare. “You’ve got a stack of bug reports a mile high to get our app to stop crashing. That’s what you should be working on.”

Spiro looked sideways for a minute, then said, “There would be more than fifteen million eight hundred thousand pieces of paper in a stack that is a mile high. It would be a waste of paper if there was only one bug report per sheet of paper but even if we take that as the premise -”

Barry held up a hand, flat, palm facing Spiro, the classic gesture to stop, and yet somehow also conveying how quickly it could start glowing with the mystical power of Iron Fist.

“I sometimes wonder whether you are aware how painful it is to talk to you. Perhaps you have weaponized conversation in an effective and devious way. Then I realize I don’t want to know the answer to that question at all, I just want you to stop.”

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